Lara Croft: Cradle of Jolie

Lara Croft: The Cradle of LifeHands down the definitive sequel of all videos game movies. Ehhh…..only because most other video games movies didn’t get a sequel.

Here we find Lara on her quest to find the Cradle of Life, the keeping place of Pandora’s box. We begin at a wedding in Greece that is disrupted by what is perceived as an earthquake. Lara and her fellow treasure hunters are there to find the Lunar Temple that was home to some of Alexander the Great’s finest treasures. They dive and find the temple where Lara discovers an orb that is the map to the Cradle of Life. Just as the structure begins to collapse around them, they are attacked and the orb is stolen from her.  She then must team up with an ex-lover to infiltrate the Hong Kong headquarters of the syndicate that stole the map to the Cradle of Life from her. After she gets the orb back she must solve its mysteries to reveal the Cradle’s location and stop the man who wants the contents of Pandora’s box to sell as the most lethal weapon the world has ever known.

If you read my review of the original movie(please do so if you haven’t already), then you pretty much know what this movie was like. More campy humor and attempts to capture the essence of the video games with results on par with the efforts of the first.  No cameo appearance by John Voight though. But it’s not all bad getting to watch Angelina Jolie run around in skimpy skin-tight outfits. One thing that didn’t make sense was the use of slow motion. It just seemed to be used at such awkward and unnecessary times for arbitrary lengths. I honestly thought there was something wrong with my connection to Netflix but I watched the movie twice and saw the exact some uses.

It was odd that the movie started at a wedding reception and ended at a wedding ceremony. This little displacement by the writers may have been an attempt at irony seeing that the reception is usually the end of a wedding and the ceremony is the begging of it. Or perhaps it was something even more mystic related to Angelina Jolie’s life. ‘What do you mean?’ you may be asking yourself. Well, let me answer you. 2003 was also the year that Jolie hooked up with her long time hubby Mr. Brad Pitt when they started filming Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Amazing!!! Ok, not really. Probably all just coincidence.

But hey…watch and just enjoy. It’s not the greatest movie you’ll watch but it won’t be the worst. It’s free on Netflix and cheap at Amazon(get both movies for twice the fun). I’m still holding on to hope for a third Lara Croft movie. It’s never to late to finish out a trilogy. But alas, if all the Internet speculation is to be believed, the franchise is expected to be rebooted. Wait a tick — then we can have a Lara Croft movie showdown!!!!


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